Entropy Sunday - I have words edition

I don't think anyone is reading any of this. The problem is that without posting a link on FB, which I quit, no one bothers to go look at bookmarked sites anymore. Nevertheless, I will continue talking into the wilderness because I have words, people!

Since the revival of this blog is related to my "year of health," I should at least say that 1) I am down just over 10 pounds for the year and my pants are starting to feel loose, 2) I don't really miss the noise on FB, although I do miss my friends, and 3) I've already read 3 books and finishing my 4th so far this year. One thing that I have noticed over the last couple of weeks is that the quality of my interactions with some friends over text messaging has gone up - more conversations, better conversations.

Yesterday morning, I spent time reading the latest issue of Down East Magazine  - the monthly magazine of Maine. I used to read this magazine every month from cover to cover the day it arrived. It is one of the things that FB replaced in my life and what a horrible loss for me. Maine is my place. It has been since the day I stepped off the plane in Portland in the autumn of 1996 and first breathed in the salt air from Casco Bay. This issue featured an interview with famous Kennebunkport resident, the late President George H. W. Bush. These quotes are particularly relevant:

"This place brings us great joy, and has since the beginning of time. You drive through the gate and you know you are home."

"I have called it my “anchor to windward.” Even when I was President, I could find peace here, even when dealing with serious issues. The sound of the sea, the salt air, even the fog horn of Goat Island Lighthouse calms the soul. And yes, clears the brain."

These two passages capture perfectly how I feel about Maine. In another he mentions that when you arrive you know you are home. And that is true for me every time I step onto the jetway in Portland. The sign above you says, "welcome home," and that's what it feels like. Boothbay Harbor is my favorite spot in Maine. I have a house picked out there just off the hilltop that I would love to own as a retirement destination. I doubt that will be practical, but as I was reading through the magazine yesterday and thinking of all my trips there, I was again prompted to think about what a life in the near future there would look like.

Another thing that has pulled my attention back to Maine is a book I'm currently reading, The Last Lobster, Boom or Bust for Maine's Greatest Fishery? by Christopher White. The book focuses on the recent boom in the lobster catch on the Midcoast of Maine and how that is an impact of climate change. The book also explores how the lobster population has decreased in Southern Maine and the rest of Southern New England. It talks about how other ocean creatures have been impacted by the changing water temperatures in the Gulf of Maine and how these animals are moving to cooler waters. Entire fisheries are being wiped out with devastating impacts on the economy. Two things strike me as I read this book. First, fishing the ocean is very much like growing crops in the Midwest. Many of the challenges that face lobstermen due to the changing climate also affect farmers that grow corn or wheat. Second, the mass migration of these sea creatures in response to a warming ocean will impact humans that live in places that become uninhabitable due to hot, dry conditions. At some point in the near future, we will likely see large numbers of climate refugees with the potential to create areas of increased instability. We need to think now how we will respond in a way that is just and compassionate. Even if we make a path to decrease our CO2 emissions now, we can probably not avoid people having to leave the places they currently live for more tolerable places.

Speaking of climate change, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez launched her bill for the Green New Deal this week and everyone set their hair on fire over it. Frankly, it would be amusing if it weren't so darned frustrating. People seem to have forgotten their Schoolhouse Rock lessons. The bill is just a starting point and if there are things you don't like about it, then you should call your Congresscritters and tell them how to improve it. We get the government that we work for. You can't go vote and then sit at home in your comfy chair and gripe. You have to engage your government to get what you want. Your representatives will listen to you the same as they listen to lobbyists and others. But if they don't hear your voice, then they will do what everyone who does talk to them wants. So get off your butts and call, or better yet, go see them in their local offices and tell them face-to-face.

My first paper dealing with climate change was submitted this week by one of my co-authors. The paper describes a novel modeling method for the accounting of greenhouse gas emissions in agricultural practices. It was submitted to Nature Sustainability. They quickly decided not to send it out for peer review because in their opinion it "wasn't of sufficient broad interest." I find that to be a load of nonsense, of course. This is not the first time I've had this experience with the Nature publishing family. The last paper they said this about was quickly accepted by the second journal due to it's "broad interest to the science community." So, it's on to the next journal. Oh, by the way, one of my co-authors won a Nobel Peace Prize for work on the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change!

It's cold and icy here today, which is putting a cramp in all of the day's plans. I suspect I will get all of the laundry done and perhaps finish this lobster book. What randomness is happening in your world today?

Entropy Wednesday - computer refresh edition

Is there any better way to kill productivity at work than by having to go through a computer refresh? I don't even want a new laptop. The old one works perfectly fine. It probably says much about modern work that you feel completely paralyzed without a computer. On the plus side, I have managed to clean at least a geological age worth of dust off my desk and shelves while listening to two episodes of Make Me Smart. On the downside, my new computer will have Windows 10 which means my entire afternoon and probably all day tomorrow will be shot trying to make my computer functional again.

In the year of health, I am happy to report that I am down 7 pounds in the weight category as of last Friday. I think I'm sleeping better and feel like my body is trying to adjust to new sleep patterns. I am also happy to report that I don't really miss FB or IG one bit. I miss my friends at some level, but I don't' feel overwhelmed by all the other useless shit that cluttered my head for much of the day.

A global report on diets healthy for people and the planet came out last week. The report suggests that we need to shift diets to mostly plant-based protein instead of animals both for human health and also to mitigate climate change. As you might imagine, entrenched interests on both ends of the spectrum are very vocal about the report which creates quite the shitshow in social media. There is clearly a nutritional crisis in the world when 1 billion people are suffering from hunger, 2 billion suffering from malnutrition, and another 2 billion people suffering from obesity. Add to that mix that agriculture is the second largest contributor to greenhouse gas emissions and it is clear that we have to rethink how our global food system works. While I don't necessarily agree with all of the report, I think it is clear we need to shift what we produce and how we produce it so that we reduce the impact of ag on the planet while at the same time increase the nutrition of all people. I could do without the rock throwing, but hopefully the report will stimulate discussions that lead to solutions and not just more bickering.

I've been on a jazz kick lately. It usually happens in winter. John Coltrane and Thelonius Monk were geniuses. I am seriously thinking of getting myself a porkpie hate in honor of Monk. Why not?

Happy Wednesday. I'll be over here the rest of the afternoon yelling obscenities at Windows 10.

Julián Castro 2020

Whether we like it or not, the 2020 campaign is upon us. I told myself that I was going to wait to fall in love with a candidate this season - after all we're still 600+ days away from the election and a year before any primary votes are counted. But last week I saw clips from Elizabeth Warren's trip to Iowa and was really impressed with the ease of her interactions with the voters at one of her forums.

Yesterday, I happened to watch Julian Castro's campaign kickoff event live from San Antonio. WOW. The entire event was broadcast on C-SPAN (shout out to government supported programming!) and the rally was strong. I find his platform to be appealing from the progressive view - a Green New Deal, Medicare for All, universal pre-K and affordable college education, no PAC campaign contributions - without being open to the harshest of criticism from the center.

I listened again to his speech this morning and I am still wowed by what he said. Watching the video, I noticed that he has some of the mannerisms of President Obama, especially in some of his speech patterns and it makes me wonder if he has enlisted some of the Obama folks on his campaign. His speech writer is fantastic. I thought out loud if perhaps Castro was aiming to be Obama2.0 and SK commented that he was more ballsy than Obama on the policy proposal front, but delivers in a way that doesn't come off as threatening the way some folks felt about President Obama.

I don't have a candidate yet, but Castro is a strong front runner out of the gate.

See his full speech below.

Snowmageddon 2019

Winter Storm Gia arrived yesterday afternoon. Why do we have to name these damned winter storms, are they jealous of hurricanes or what?

Currently outside there is at least a foot of snow. You will notice in the photo that my driveway is clear. I shoveled it 5 times over the last 24 hours.

I've always been a shoveler, well ever since I moved to the Midwest where it actually snows, unlike West Texas where there is not usually enough to shovel. I always shovel more than once during a snow storm unless it's one of those non-events that doesn't really warrant breaking out the shovel. I catch a lot of grief for my shoveling proclivity. Why are you shoveling while it is still snowing? Can't you wait until it's done? It's 10 p.m. why are you going out again?

I love to shovel. I have an ergonomic shovel with one of those S-curved handles. It's much easier on your back, especially when the snow is wet and heavy. From a practical standpoint, I shovel multiple times when there's a larger accumulation expected because it is easier on my back. It's much easier to move a couple of inches of snow at a time rather than a foot all at once.

The other reason I enjoy shoveling has little to do with practicality. I find shoveling to be a very relaxing activity, both physically and mentally. I find the repetition of going back and forth across the driveway very Zen-like, not unlike raking a Japanese garden in some sense. There's something very much about the pattern of creating a nicely groomed driveway that brings some sense of order and belonging. The best shoveling happens at night, the later the better. When it is snowing enough to keep everyone inside, there's a special kind of quiet that blankets the neighborhood. If you listen carefully, you can hear the sound of the snow. You can hear the occasional animal off in the distance. The repetitive sound of the shovel scraping on the pavement echos in the night that can create a very meditative trance-like state. At night, you can very much create a nice state of presence in the world, one that never fails to awaken that sense of wonder in me that the normal rush of life can suppress.

So thank you, Gia, for bringing the chance to stop, relax, and be present in a quiet, snowy wonderland this weekend.

Podcasts

I have become a big fan of podcasts over the last few years. A couple of years ago when I started my daily workout routine during lunch, I would always listen to a podcast. The 40-50 minute length was perfect for the time I was spending on the elliptical and it allowed me to learn more about things I was interested in, but also new things.

A little over a year ago, I was a guest on a climate adaptation podcast - America Adapts. It was a blast being on even though I was worried I might be walking into a trap. The conversation lasted more than an hour and I think we created an episode that make people think about agriculture and climate change.

Here are a few of my favorite podcasts:

1. On Being. I am not normally a fan of podcasts that are just repeats of a normal radio or tv show with nothing new added. However, I have always been a fan of On Being, or "NPR Church" as I like to call it and having the show as a podcast allowed me to listen when I couldn't be close to the radio on a Sunday morning. Hostess Krista Tippett covers a wide range of topics related to spirituality and I often find that listening to the show helps ground me in a more mindful way for the week.

2. Zigzag. First things first. Let's just get it out of the way now - Manoush Zomorodi is my podcrush <3 I first became familiar with her as the hostess of the podcast Note to Self, a podcast about the role of technology in our lives. It was a really thoughtful way to make you consider the impact of the technology in our lives these days. She also wrote a book from the experience - Bored and Brilliant: How Spacing Out Can Unlock Your Most Productive and Creative Self. I highly recommend it as it has steps to help you put down the phone and open your brain spaces. Manoush and her producer Jen Poyant left WNYC to start their own media company based on blockchain technology as a way to try to bring more transparency and honesty to journalism while at the same time empowering women. You will learn about blockchain, you will learn how bots manipulate social media, and you will follow the ups and downs of these two kickass women. I love them and make sure I have the new episode ready for my commute the morning after it drops.

3. Make Me Smart. Every evening on the commute home, I almost always listen to the day's economic recap on Marketplace via NPR. Host Kai Ryssdal makes it all sound so simple (THE STOCK MARKET IS NOT THE ECONOMY). In this podcast, Kai and fellow Marketplace personality Molly Wood talk about topics at the intersection of economics, technology, and culture. As the motto of the show says, "none of us is as smart as all of us," and I always learn something cool on this podcast. It is my secret desire to actually be on this podcast someday as a guest.

4. Bagman. This is a single season podcast from the best journalist working today, Rachel Maddow. The podcast covers the story of former Vice President Spiro Agnew and his downfall in only 7 episodes. I was in elementary school during Watergate and I knew that Agnew resigned but I had no idea why. This podcast goes in depth to show the level of corruption of Agnew and the criminal activity behind trying to stop the investigation into his taking bribes in the White House. For the first time, we learn that Nixon and Agnew recruited George H. W. Bush to try to shut down the investigation into Agnew by pressuring a Republican Senator from Maryland whose brother was one of the federal prosecutors investigating Agnew. This was uncovered in a small university library in Maryland. There are tapes of Nixon and Agnew talking in the Oval Office about getting Bush to try to shut this down. Just imagine if this tidbit were known when HW Bush was running for office in the 80s. I doubt he would have become Vice President, much less President. Fascinating stuff here.

5. The Uncertain Hour. This another from our friends at Marketplace. I got into this one at Season One during my former workout period. Season One deals with welfare reform under the Clinton Administration (a disastrous policy as covered in the wonderful book by Peter Edelman - Searching for America's Heart: RFK and the Renewal of Hope). The pod deals with controversial topics around the economy in our society. Season 2 is a look at regulations, where they come from and how they impact our lives. Hosted by Krissy Clark from the Wealth and Poverty beat at Marketplace. This one will probably change your mind about things that you thought you knew.

6. Slow Radio. Last but not least for now a new podcast I just stumbled upon, Slow Radio from the BBC. This delightful little nugget is 20-30 minutes of everyday sounds in the world. You are encouraged to "step back, let go, immerse yourself: it’s time to go slow." I am looking forward to listening to the series of episodes recorded in a monastery - Monks chanting, etc. One episode covered life on a river in Tennessee. The old lady talking reminded me of the stories that my grandparents used to tell me about life during the Depression down in East Texas. I think this podcast might be a great way to start off a day in mindfulness, or perhaps unwind at the end of the day.

If you don't do podcasts, I encourage your to step out there and give them a shot. There are literally thousands of them covering every topic imaginable. You can find them on Apple's iTunes, or Stitcher. Many shows also have their own websites where you can listen to episodes.

Entropy Friday - Facebook free edition

Greetings! Entropy is the tendency toward randomness and on my old blog I used to create entries of random things and call them Entropy (day of the week). So, here's to old habits...

A little context for my first post in a long while...
For the past few years, in lieu of New Year's resolutions, I've chosen a "word for the year" to highlight a focus for me and provide context for the coming year. This year, the word is HEALTH. I intend to focus on all aspects, physical, mental, emotional, intellectual, spiritual. Outside of being somewhat overweight, I'm not doing terrible, but there are things I can improve.

One of the first things I have done is to give up on Facebook and all its platforms (Instagram, Messenger, WhatsApp). The tipping point for me was their latest privacy issues - giving access to private messages to companies like Netflix and Spotify. The level of control we are willingly giving over to corporations astounds me and it isn't clear to me that we understand all of the implications. On top of that, I found myself spending too much of my time scrolling there looking for God knows what and clearly not finding it. So, that is the first unhealthy behavior to go.

After a few days, I can honestly say I don't really miss it. On a few occasions I have caught myself wondering what someone is up to, but realized that it was just as likely as FB wouldn't really answer that question for me. One thing that freeing up that space in my head has allowed me to do is think more about where the direction of my work might go in the coming year or so. After almost 2 years of leaving the research space, I am now completely immersed in the climate change field and all of the controversy that entails. I will expound on that in the near future, but does it ever move fast and is interesting every day,

Last night, KJ told me that next year for his science credit, he was thinking of taking the AP Environmental Science course. The teacher had come around to tell them about it and his thought was "my dad would love this class." As he's contemplated college and careers, I've told him that anything he could do to tie his interests to climate change would be a good way to stay employable because climate change is going to impact his entire life. We'll see if he follows through, but it was heartening to hear him thinking about it.

Reading less FB has freed up more time to read other things. I picked up several books over the holidays and have started reading The Way of Paradox: Spiritual Life as Taught by Meister Eckhart. I found out about this book reading a recent book on one of my favorite poets, John O'Donohue. I've heard references to Eckhart mostly from the On Being podcast and hopefully this is a good introduction.

On the physical health side, my cousin Alex and I are having a weight loss contest - the closest to 160 by June 1 is the winner - reward TBD. I have not started off the year so well in the exercise dept, but plan to get going next week. This has been an slow easing back into the work routine after a couple of weeks off.

McK is back to college this weekend. So good to have the kid back home but so excited to see her future unfolding in front of us. Off to enjoy the last couple of days with her for a while.

The Unlikely Road to Here

What does a kid who’s only goal was to go to medical school and be the world’s best cardiothoracic surgeon do when he flunks second semester organic chemistry? It’s not a question I was ever prepared to think about much less answer. I suppose that’s what happens when everything seems to come easy to you, until one day it doesn’t.

In those days at Texas Tech, most premed students majored in biochemistry with a minor in biology. I found myself halfway to a degree in biochemistry with no clue what to do with it when I graduated. The obvious but undesirable answer was to sell drugs to doctors for some big pharmaceutical company – how humiliating for the kid who was going to be the next Michael DeBakey. As part of my degree plan, I enrolled in Undergraduate Research 4000 thinking I would get a taste of the research lab which I somehow envisioned was different than the laboratory coursework I had experienced. This is when my path first crossed with Dr. Robert W Shaw, at least I think it was our first significant interaction. It turned out to be the beginning of a 30-year friendship that lasts to this day.

My undergraduate research experience didn’t turn out as I envisioned. Bob asked me and my two cohorts to forego working in the lab for working in the library. We each had a list of journals and topics that were relevant to his interests and we were to go to the library each week and scan the journals for the topics at hand and bring back citations for any relevant papers. Well, that’s an easy “A.” As it turns out, that undergraduate “research” experience turned out to be critical to my professional development. First, it gave me a broader exposure to science outside of whatever essentials we covered in classwork. Reading those papers opened the world of science beyond the old lessons of the textbook to the frontiers of biochemistry. Second, and perhaps more important, it got me into the habit of keeping up with the current literature and thus the cutting edge of scientific research. Even as I started graduate school and into my postdoc work, I made it a point to go the library each week and scan my favorite journals.

During that year, I decided that instead of pushing pills to doctors, I would go on to graduate school and decided to stay at Texas Tech. My intention was to work with Dr. Shaw and so I started out in his lab. However, when it came time to choose a lab for my doctoral work, my friends and I chose the new professor in the department who worked on “cancer research,” much sexier than enzymology! Bob took this news in stride and agreed to be on my doctoral committee.

No matter your plans, life has a way of working out differently much of the time. Despite my working in another lab on my project, Bob ended up giving me lots of input and advice on my work. It was in his graduate courses where my love of biophysics was born and blossomed, an interest that lasts to this day. But perhaps the most important lesson of my graduate experience had little to do with science and everything to do with ethics in science.

My first project in graduate school involved trying to stop the enzyme that HIV uses to multiply. Since it was an enzymology project, Dr. Shaw was involved with guiding me through the work. It started off well with exciting results, but soon things got complicated and I ran into a seemingly insurmountable wall. I dropped the project and moved on to what became my thesis project. Near the end of my time in grad school, my future postdoc secured, my graduate advisor placed a manuscript for publication on my desk. It contained the work from my first project. However, the data were cherry-picked to support the initial observations and all the negative data omitted. I was told that if I didn’t submit the paper with my name as an author, I could not graduate.  I knew I could not let this stand and went to Dr. Shaw and he counseled me to go to the department Chair. Bob knew the work almost as well as I and understood that this was unethical. My doctoral committee met and decided that the paper could not be published and that I could graduate. It was a scary ordeal for a soon to be Ph.D. and I would not have survived without Bob’s support.

I learned yesterday that Bob is retiring after a long distinguished career. As I sit here at my desk and think of journey over the last 30 years I can honestly say that I don’t think I would be here if I had not had the good fortune to cross path with Dr. Shaw all those years ago. He passed along to me his love for biophysics – how biological processes are controlled by the laws of physics – which led to my lifelong love for how proteins are put together. He taught me how to always ask the right questions, the big questions, the ones whose answers matter. He reinforced that it is always OK to stand up for what is right in science. From him I learned that I should not be the constraint on my own possibilities, that my own little world wasn’t all there is and that I can have an impact in the bigger world.

Bob started off as my teacher, then my mentor, and along the way became a good friend. I have tried along the way to pass along those same lessons to the many scientists who have passed through my various research groups through the years. If I have had half the impact that he has had on my career, then I count myself both successful and fortunate. Thank you my friend for all you have done for me and the many others that have crossed your path. Well done! Enjoy your retirement!

I quit Facebook

After nine years, I finally gave up on the Facebook. It wasn't a rash decision. I didn't have a fight and run. I'm not hiding from some personal drama. What I know is this, Facebook became a cesspool for me. Perhaps because I work at an agricultural biotech company and also love politics, my newsfeed was overloaded with piss and vinegar. I would be hard pressed to come up with two other areas where the discourse rarely rises out of petty name-calling and sewer-like "dialog." With each passing day, I would refresh my newsfeed and feel more and more overwhelmed. More and more I found myself looking at Facebook and asking myself, what the hell is the point?

A little over two weeks ago, I deactivated my account. "Do you really want to deactivate your account? Perhaps you should just logoff instead." No, I really want to do this. I clicked yes, and just like that my existence on Facebook became more nebulous. I consciously did not delete my account. Much of my life over the last several years is documented there and I don't want to let that all go - too many photos, my kids growing up, the break up of my marriage if you pay close enough attention, and the blossoming and maturing of my life and outlook over the last couple of years. I decided to leave all of that in its digital box, tightly sealed up until a time where I can open it up without the burden of feeling overwhelmed by the ugliness of the world. I also removed further temptation by deleting its app from my phone.

I suppose my post-Facebook experience was not unlike withdrawals from any other kind of addiction. Let's face it, Facebook was my digital crack. I know the chemistry in my brain was reacting to every "like" or notification or comment just like any other reward system. The first day I found myself picking up my phone and scrolling only to come up empty. I wondered what my friends were saying. I clicked on the bookmark only to get a logon screen, which, if activated would reactivate my account and plunge me right back in. Perhaps the hardest was that weekend. We went to visit my daughter who has just moved away for college.  When I travel, I take many photos of my trip and post them all on Facebook in their own little neat album. This trip was no different, except I had nowhere to share the photos. No place where the rest of my family could see my daughter in her new city. So I left them on my phone.

But coming back home, I did not feel I was missing out on anything by not seeing the world through the lens of Facebook. I followed news via Twitter, which I find less depressing than Facebook. I found that I had more time to live in the world that surrounds me, not the digital world. I read more, books for pleasure, and technical literature in my field. I took up painting and have finished my first two small works, both scenes from my trip to Paris last fall with SK. Last weekend I went to visit SK in NYC. As usual, I took photos around the city, capturing the off the path scenes of life that are new to a Texas boy. I did catch myself thinking a few times that it would be cool to share them, but I did not fret about it. In fact, I have found that this week I have not fretted about social media at all. I have felt a calm about things and have discovered a clearer head with which to think about the world around me, the life I lead and the life I desire.

I do miss things about Facebook. I live apart from all of my family. Facebook was a place that allowed us to connect and to keep up with our lives apart. Given that I overshared, they probably miss more than I. I miss the happenings of a few of my closest friends. I know I am missing some cool links to interesting things in the corners of the internet that I no longer frequent. But I am also finding better ways to connect with those closest to me, ways that seem more intimate and healthier than wading through the noise of social media. I am sure that at some point I will reactivate my account and probably filter everything to a more manageable level. But for now, this is good. This is right.

Entropy Monday - transitions edition

Yesterday my boy played in his 3rd all-star game in 4 years. This year he won the skills competition for the fastest runner. This was his finest season to date in his young baseball career.  Last year was probably his greatest improvement as a baseball player, he actually became a baseball player - focused, a student of how to play the game. This year he really worked on becoming a better player. We bought him a hitting net and he hit at least 100 pitches off a tee almost every day during the season. It paid off with a .815 batting average over the season - likely a 400 point improvement over last season (he didn't keep his stats last season, another change this year). His immediate goal is to make the high school team next spring. Longer term, he wants to play in college and perhaps the MLB. Lofty goals, but he knows hard work will pay off now.

My daughter leaves for college in a couple of weeks. She joins the Conservatory of Performing Arts at Point Park University. She has become such a talented performer the last 5 years. Getting into the CoPA is as hard as getting an NIH grant these days. She has dreams of making it to NYC and Broadway and PPU has an excellent reputation in getting their students there. I know she's going to be great. I don't know exactly how I am going to feel about her being gone. The past year because of all of her school and work activities, I have not seen much of her. And yet, her presence is still felt even when we only see her for a few minutes in a day. I guess I haven't thought much about it until now. The times goes by so damned fast.

I have fallen in love with NYC. Five years ago I would find uttering those words unfathomable.  My first visit to see SK, she took me to many of the tourist sites - Empire State, Times Square, Broadway, Central Park - and they were cool. But most visits since, I have gone to see her and not "visit the city." Of course we have seen the city, but the side of the city that's out of the way. I see the NYC that a resident sees - the neighborhoods, the events, the crowded subway. Granted, I am there "on vacation" but still I feel like I am getting an authentic experience and frankly, I love it. I could see myself living there at some point. As SK points out, it's great if you're rich and you can throw money back at all the problems the city sends your way. I highly doubt that will ever be my circumstance. But NYC, you're on my radar.

That's probably enough randomness for one day. I'm off to read a paper on the van der Waals interactions that determine the unique properties of water.

His name is Slatts

I first "met" him in September of 2005, the 24th to be exact. I know this because we both blogged at LiveJournal and that's the day he first left a comment on my blog. His comment had nothing to do with my entry, but was in response to the "Current music - Bob Dylan Desolation Row" tag at the end of the blog.

Great song! Did you catch Dylan's performance of this in No Direction Home?

Of course our first conversation would be over music. Slatts was a bass player, played in real bands. I play guitar, alone, in my room, with a cd. But we bonded over an affinity for the same music - old rock-n-roll, blues. This began our friendship - over Dylan and a blog posting.

Our friendship continued to grow over our shared passion for music. But Slatts lived in Massachusetts and so we also bonded over the Red Sox and our love of Maine. He went on vacation in Maine every year it seems, paddling on the lake. Maine is my spiritual home and seeing his photos always made me smile and just a little homesick.

How did I become "friends" with Slatts on LiveJournal in the first place? My ex-wife is a writer and blogged there with her writing friends. That was my entry into LJ and you see, Slatts was an artist - a damned good one. He made the most incredible drawings of celebrities, many of them musicians. Don't take my word for it. You can see for yourself.  His entries often showed the behind-the-curtain world of art in progress. One of my favorite Slatts techniques is his drawing of musicians' heads on other people's bodies. To call him a Beatles fanatic would be understating the word fanatic. One of my favorite examples of this technique is the piece he created by putting all of the Beatles' heads on top of his own body. Slatts became the Fab Four. It's just brilliant.

I grew up in Lubbock, Texas, the home of Buddy Holly.  Buddy was my hero growing up. It was pretty cool to a little kid to think that one of the guys who started rock-n-roll grew up on the same streets as I. A simple kid from a small town in West Texas could change the world. So imagine my surprise the day Slatts asked me if I could take some photos of me holding my Strat while wearing a coat and tie, so that he could make a Buddy Holly piece. Of course it took all of a few seconds to say, "yes!!!" I took the photos as requested but knowing Buddy also played around in jeans and a white t-shirt, I took some of those, too, and sent them all along. And then on February 3rd, 2007, the work was completed. Slatts had made me Buddy Holly! I really cannot describe how awesome it felt to know that Slatts had turned me into my teen idol. He sent along an original for me to keep. Sometime later, Slatts took those photos of me in the t-shirt with my guitar and turned me into Keith Richards. I was always a Stones fan, too. So imagine how it felt getting to be both Buddy and Keith.

As our friendship grew over the years, we talked about meeting up on one of my trips to Boston, catching a game at Fenway, having some beers together, jamming to some old songs. It always seemed that work or life got in the way and we never got to meet up. You see, Slatts is my friend. But we've never actually been in the same place at the same time. The age of the internet created the opportunity to connect with people without ever having to actually meet them in person. I've often heard and even used the term "virtual friends."

A couple of years ago, I found out Slatts had cancer. It turns out it was terminal. He kept working during his chemo treatments, finishing an autobiographical magazine where he told his story with his own illustrations. After his diagnosis, I had a trip to Boston planned. We talked and decided we wanted to get together and share that beer that we had always talked about. But my schedule and the timing of a chemo treatment ruined those plans. "Next time," we said. Two weeks ago, the cancer had gotten to the point where hospice became the appropriate treatment. In that time, I've thought a lot about my friendship with Slatts and all the good times we had. He was such a fun-loving guy, always there with a big smile on his face. We always had something cool to talk about. And, I have a whole collection of coffee mugs with his artwork on them. Slatts has passed on now. In the age of the internet we can make friends with people we've never actually met. As I sit here and remember my friend Slatts, it hurts like hell, as much or more than if we had grown up together in the same town. He was truly my friend, and god, am I going to miss him.